Never did she imagine the path of having a baby to be so arduous. Elyse shares how God purified her through the disappointments and turned her brokenness into joy.
by Elyse Tay
Edna, our baby, is a gift from God. This story began in 2003 when Ethan and I tied the knot. A year later, we decided to start a family. The dream and pride of cradling a baby in my arms was so wonderful. Never did we imagine the journey ahead to be so eventful.
2011 – JOURNEY OF INFERTILITY
To say we waited long to have Edna was an understatement. It was a ten-year wait!
After six years of futile attempts, we saw a fertility specialist. The possibility of infertility was a giant that confronted us. Our doctor took us through a month of examination. The final verdict: we could not conceive naturally. IVF (In Vitro Fertilisation) was our only recourse.
In 2011, we went ahead with IVF. As we did the embryo transfer, Doc stressed that this was all he could do to help. The breath of life was from God. In the end, It was unsuccessful. To face the painful reality of failure was like being thrown from the top of the mountain to the bottom of the cliff. The pain was heart-wrenching!
2012 – THE MISCARRIAGE
Four months later, I became pregnant. The subsequent blood test confirmed my pregnancy! But all was not well. In my 6th week, I learnt that the foetus was not growing well. Sure enough, two days later, I started bleeding and miscarried.
2013 – THE PROMISE!
Fast forward – 1 January 2013. While jogging, I told God that I surrender the desire to have a child. If He ever blessed me with one, I wanted to step out of the shadow of the miscarriage and be joyful instead.
In February, I had a dream that was so vivid in my mind. In the dream, I was attracted by the sound of a beautiful tune being played on the piano. Going into the room, I sat next to the lady playing the piano. Suddenly she turned, looked at me, and said that I would have a baby girl!
In June, lo and behold, I became pregnant! God’s peace just flooded my spirit and great joy filled me throughout the pregnancy.
I realised this was a season of purification. The questions of “why did I want to have children?”, selfish motives were challenged by the Lord. The notion of parenting matured over time. Marriage bonds were strengthened too.
Hanging on during challenging moments would be extra difficult if we did not have close friends and our cell group journeying alongside us. They rejoiced and grieved with us. They felt our pain, gave us space when we needed it and yet welcomed us back when we were ready. Such lavish love comforted us when we were feeling down.
A key combination of factors – God, friends and cell group – made our journey that much easier.
To God be the glory and praise for a precious gift.
Elyse is married to Ethan and is a Stay- At-Home Mum to Edna. her family attends Saturday Praise Service.
This article first appeared in Issue 17, November 2017 CHORUS Magazine.